Written by Sasha, 17 October 2024
Psychopath Manipulation Tactics
The various types of manipulation tactics I am conveying are the ones that I have encountered in my interactions with psychopaths. So, I may not possess precise labels or categories for each strategy. While specific terminology may not be available, I can provide insights and guidance based on the observed patterns and effects of these manipulative behaviors.
Gaslighting
Picture made by Marco Mazzoni
This tactic leads you to question your perception of reality. Let’s say you remember an event in a certain manner, the psychopath will bluntly deny it and present an alternate version. When they repeatedly use this strategy, you will eventually become confused, anxious, or afraid and start doubting your memory and sanity.
A common tactic I have seen a few of them use is hiding belongings or placing them in other spots than where you put them. This creates confusion and doubt. Sometimes, if there is a large group of people involved and items start missing, big arguments break out.
If you believe something happened one way, or that you have placed an object in a specific spot, trust your gut, not the words of the psychopath, this will help you maintain a firm grasp on reality.
Dictionary: Brainwashing
“The process of pressuring someone into adopting radically different beliefs by using systematic and often forcible means”:
Brainwashing
One telltale sign of brainwashing is when your conversations become unnaturally repetitive, with them consistently restating the same message. This message will often have a negative connotation. The repetition is a deliberate attempt to implant a specific idea or belief in your mind. Stay attentive and recognize this pattern as manipulation.
Never forget who you are and always stay true to your beliefs and values. Refuse to allow others to change them unless it positively contributes to your growth and well-being.
Isolation
Psychopaths often employ tactics such as isolating you for extended periods. When in isolation they will mold, manipulate, and brainwash you according to their preferences. They will gossip about your friends, family, and acquaintances, or create unnecessary drama when you want to spend time with them. These behaviors are intended to discourage you from wanting to meet with your loved ones until you reach a point where you no longer want to maintain any type of social interaction.
Gossiping
One of the mildest forms of manipulation tactics employed by psychopaths involves turning your friends and family against you, in order to make others believe their version of events instead of your own. You must voice your concerns to your friends and family before the psychopath has a chance to falsely label you as the manipulative one. By openly sharing your side of the story, you can protect your integrity and prevent the psychopath from trashing your reputation.
Be especially aware of this manipulation strategy if you have a coworker or boss who is a psychopath. They can severely damage your career. Seek to get transferred while maintaining a low profile at work throughout the whole process.
Minimizing your feelings
Psychopaths often employ tactics to undermine your emotions and minimize your feelings, particularly when they are the cause of your distress. They may dismiss your concerns, making you believe that you are overreacting or exaggerating the situation. They downplay the seriousness of their actions, labeling them as insignificant. By doing so, they leave you feeling invalidated and questioning your judgment, you start doubting yourself and feel delusional about your own experiences.
Verbal Abuse
Psychopaths can be extremely verbally abusive. Their tactics include name-calling, belittling, and using an angry or loud tone. Their goal is to keep you in a state of fear and powerlessness, making you easier to control. They also may attempt to break your self-esteem by constantly criticizing your actions, and appearance, or even by complimenting others, particularly in front of you. They aim to make you feel lesser than others, as maintaining control is their priority. It is crucial not to fall for their mind games. Instead, choose to ignore their abusive behavior or physically walk away from the situation. If you start thinking and feeling negatively about yourself, counteract these feelings by practicing positive self-talk and focus on building your own self-worth.
Breaking Your Spirit and Martyrdom
In my personal experience, I found that the purpose behind this behavior was to chip away at my confidence and identity. Each incident left me increasingly devoted and obedient to him. It became a sick pattern of manipulation where he exerted control over me, gradually molding me into the person he desired me to be, his puppet.
They aim to break your spirit by making up lies, such as accusing you of flirting with someone else. He will make himself out to be the victim while subjecting you to hours of relentless screaming until you fall to your knees in tears. This behavior can be described as a form of emotional martyrdom. They will hover over you, displaying their power, and only when they sense you have reached your breaking point or when you confess to something you have not done, will they suddenly switch to showing you affection by hugging or kissing you saying they are sorry. However, it’s important to note that this pattern is not consistent. Their actions largely depend on the extent of emotional devastation or psychological damage they want to inflict upon you. They may even disappear for days, leaving you in heightened emotional turmoil and a severe sense of confusion.
In general, a common maneuver is that they disappear for days without saying where they are and turn off their phone. Eventually, they will show up, with a lame excuse or none at all.
Silent Treatment and Predatory Stare
In this manipulative tactic, they stare right at you with a dead gaze, not blinking, and in eerie silence. If you try to talk to them it is not uncommon that they will persist in maintaining their unresponsive glare. At first, this can be highly disturbing, it feels like somewhat of a horror movie. The silent treatment can last for days or even weeks, leaving a significant impact on your emotions. Try not to get affected, remind yourself that this behavior is a strategy intended to keep you scared and uncertain. Become comfortable with silence.
Baiting you
They are fully aware of your vulnerabilities and triggers, and will intentionally bring up topics that provoke anger, sadness, or fear as they feed off the drama it entails. They use this tactic when they observe that you are happy and successful in life. By pinpointing your vulnerabilities or “hot buttons,” they aim to undermine your emotional stability and maintain control over you and your emotional state. Recognize the pattern and avoid getting drawn into a triggering discussion.
Sabotage
A psychopath loves to sabotage other people’s goals. They will deliberately act in opposition to your wants and desires. For instance, if you say that you are on a diet, they will intentionally bring you the food that you have a weakness for tempting you to fall off the wagon. Or they will compete with you and try to lose more weight before you. It is important to recognize this as pure manipulation and remain steadfast in your own choices and boundaries.
Dictate Your Happiness
They tend to take the things you enjoy, such as spending time with friends, playing games, or going out dancing, and twist them into something negative. They will create reasons or excuses to prevent you from doing whatever brings you happiness. As always, recognize the pattern and do not allow them to strip away the things that bring you fulfillment. Remember, you have the power to maintain your happiness and should not let anyone dictate your life.
The Dance Of Disarray
This tactic comes solely from my own experience, I have not read about it or heard anyone talk about it.
They engage in a bewildering “dance” (movement) that leaves you feeling disoriented. There are two variations of this “dance”. In one scenario, the psychopath encircles the victim, verbally assaulting them with profanities and demeaning remarks, gradually wearing them down until they break down in tears. The important part here is that they move rapidly around you while screaming and name-calling you.
The other scenario involves a larger group of people. They create chaos by moving rapidly amongst everyone, misplacing objects, and asking where they are. The movement combined with everyone searching for the objects induces confusion and disarray. In both cases, it causes something that feels like an “energetic storm,” which contributes to the overall sense of confusion.
To maintain your stability, you can ground yourself by closing your eyes and focusing on your breath. Cover your ears to block out the psychopath screaming. By creating this internal space, you shield yourself from their manipulation and regain a sense of clarity, in the moment.
Conclusion
The manipulation tactics used by professional manipulators are numerous, and there are likely even more that haven’t been covered here. These strategies aren’t exclusive to psychopaths; they’re often employed by individuals with anti-social tendencies and a variety of other personality types as well.
I hope you’ve found my posts on psychopaths informative and helpful. If you’re dealing with a psychopath, please seek professional help in your country. Whatever you do, never share your suspicions about them with them and never reveal your plans if you want to leave them.
Feel free to contact me if you have any questions!
Have you come across people like this in life? How have you battled them? Leave a comment and let us know ❤️
You can read more about psychopaths in my previous blog posts:
References:
Psychopath: What It Is and Differences From a Sociopath (verywellhealth.com)
The Emotional Lives of Psychopaths | Psychology Today
41 Manipulation Tactics Used By Narcissists, Psychopaths, And Sociopaths (abusewarrior.com)
4 Core Tactics of Psychological Manipulators | Psychology Today
What is gaslighting? Examples and how to respond (medicalnewstoday.com)
Helpline:
If you live in Sweden – Call; Kvinnofridslinijen 020 – 50 50 50
How to Find a Narcissistic Abuse Support Group (verywellmind.com)
9 Clues That You May Be Dealing With a Psychopath | Psychology Today
Jenna
It’s so unfortunate that psychopaths can easily create such hostile, abusive environments. I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with this. 🫶🏽 I’ve seen this happen to certain friends and family members and it’s scary how much control people like this can have on someone.
spirit.expanding
Thank you so much for your kind words Jenna ❤ It is scary how a person can twist our thoughts into a knot. Weirdly this happens quite fast as well. We have to raise awareness and support one another ❤ Much love to you ❤
Ginger
Interesting and very useful article. There are unfortunately a lot of manipulators in the world, people who can sometimes be close to us. And I feel that this post can really help anyone become aware of the manipulative tactics that such people can employ. Thanks for sharing!
spirit.expanding
Thank you for your comment Ginger. Yes, there are so many out there and it is important to raise awareness so innocent people do not get hurt unnecessarily. Much love to you and keep on shining ❤
Corrinne
This is all so accurate! They love to manipulative and sabotage you. Really helpful post. Thank you!
spirit.expanding
Thank you Corrinne. I appreciate the support ❤️
Domii
It is interesting reading about psychopaths, I like watching the movies too. Your article covers so many aspects. Thanks for sharing!
spirit.expanding
Thank you ❤ I used to do the same until I met my ex-boyfriend 😉 ❤
Danoue Goueth
Thank you for shedding light on these manipulation tactics! Your posts have been incredibly informative.
spirit.expanding
Thank you ❤